Living Surrendered in Motherhood – Living Made New
Living Surrendered in Motherhood
Together Church | Lauren Clay
May 11, 2025 | Mother’s Day | Series: Living Made New
INTRODUCTION
Good morning and Happy Mother’s Day! I am thrilled and honored to have the opportunity to speak to all of you mamas this morning.
Now I have to start out by being really honest with all of you. I am a tad nervous. I speak in front of people all the time. In fact, every single day I speak in front of roughly 70- 100 different people throughout the day. The thing is, that they are pre-K – 6th grade. I get to be an elementary music teacher and kids are a lot more forgiving than adults. I can mess up or say the wrong thing and I usually just get a giggle or an “ Oh Mrs. Clay” eye roll and we move on. So just bear that in mind as we move forward and be as nice as you can.
When Brandon asked me to share the message on Mother’s Day I was honored, excited, and a little intimidated. I don’t take bringing the word of God to all of you this morning lightly. I want you to know that the message was covered in prayer, and I really sought the Lord for what he might have me share.
I actually had the privilege to speak at a women’s conference at a church in Chickasha at the beginning of April and I considered sharing that same message with all of you ladies this morning. It would’ve been really applicable and relevant to mothers. But a little over a week ago I was actually in Washington DC on a school trip with my son Brightson. While in DC we were able to visit the museum of the bible. That museum alone is absolutely worth a trip to Washington DC if you ever have the opportunity to go!
At the museum of the bible they have several different walk-through the Bible type experiences. In one of the experiences, they were talking about the story of Abraham and Isaac; a story that I’m sure many of us, if not, all of us, are familiar with. A statement was made during that exhibit that has just resonated with me since. If you remember, in this story, God tells Abraham to sacrifice his only son Isaac. We are actually going to read through the story in just a minute, just to refresh our memories. But this statement shared at the Museum has had me really reflecting on this story ever since. The statement was this:
The sacrifice was never supposed to be Isaac. It was always Abraham.
Just let that sink in for a minute.
It’s easy to read this story and just think about the fact that Isaac was the sacrifice. But that’s not actually how it ends. Spoiler alert – Isaac lives. But the truth is, from the very beginning of the story, the sacrifice was never Isaac. It was always Abraham. God was calling Abraham to give of himself, even if it cost what he loved most.
I want us to open our Bibles to Genesis chapter 22. Now, before I start reading, let me just give you a little bit of background.
Abraham was chosen by God to be the father of the nation of Israel. God asked Abraham and his wife, Sarah, to trust Him by leaving their homeland and going to a new land that God would show them. Abraham had faith in God, and it was counted as righteousness.
God promised Abraham that He would make a mighty nation out of him. He promised he would have descendants too great to be numbered. He promised those descendants would inherit this new land as a land of promise. God also promised to bless the whole world through Abraham.
Here’s the catch – for any of those promises to come true, Abraham had to have a son. But he and Sarah were barren. God was calling them to trust Him completely.
At one point, both Sarah and Abraham took matters into their own hands. Abraham fathered a son through Sarah’s handmaiden. But this lack of trust only made matters worse. God had His plans, and no human intervention would thwart them.
Abraham and Sarah eventually grew very old – Sarah was 90 and Abraham was 100! And then God did a miracle – he opened Sarah’s womb and she gave birth to this son of promise… Isaac!
Now, there’s so much more to the story. But that little snapshot should help us understand this fact – Isaac was a very cherished child. A child of promise, a child given in their old age, and a child that would change the world.
And this is where the story begins today. Genesis 22. So open your Bibles with me and let’s read through this passage together.
Read Genesis 22 out of my Bible.
What an incredible story. Can you see it? Can you see that the real sacrifice in the story was Abraham? It’s as if God was saying Abraham, “How much do you love me? Enough to give me what you love most?” Isaac was never intended to be the sacrifice. God wanted Abraham to sacrifice himself and to completely surrender to God.
That my friends, is the epitome of surrender. When God calls us to give everything to him. If you are anything like me, there is nothing on this earth that compares to the value of your children. And it shouldn’t be any other way. What a gift they are.
One of the most beautiful and simultaneously difficult parts of motherhood is this, don’t miss it,
Mom’s – God wants to use motherhood to bring you to a place of total surrender to Him.
There are so many beautiful things that motherhood has taught me. But I don’t know that any of them have been as difficult, and as life-changing as surrender.
Motherhood, in many ways, has wrecked me and built me.
Motherhood has left me feeling like my arms and my heart are so full that I could burst and at the same time left me feeling completely helpless and in so much need.
It is this combination of fullness and emptiness that motherhood brings that reminds me of the joy and gift it is, and the daily call that it requires to surrender to God.
There may never be a responsibility or task that I am given by God that bears as much weight on my heart as raising children to love and know God. But here’s the thing, I’m called to raise them, but I don’t own them. They are His. God has trusted me with three beautiful children, but they are not mine. And that reminder, causes me to surrender.
I think that there’s lots of aspects of my life that I’ve had to learn to surrender as a result of motherhood, but I want to talk about three of them with you today.
BODY
So what does God call us to surrender in motherhood?
- In motherhood, God calls us to surrender ourselves.
- Motherhood requires us to surrender the perception that other people might have.
- We have to surrender our children to the Lord.
Think about that first one…
- God calls us to surrender ourselves.
Just like Abraham, God is using your motherhood to call you into complete surrender.
It doesn’t take much time of being a mother to realize that God calls you to surrender yourself. In fact, it starts really early. It actually starts before your kids are even born. Pregnancy is no joke. It is a literal constant reminder that I am giving of myself. Morning sickness. Sleepless nights – have you ever tried rolling over 9 months pregnant?? Physical changes to your body. And so much more are literal tangible reminders that you are sacrificing yourself.
And then your baby is born. That sweet baby you are holding in your arms and you look down at them and immediately they want to eat. And so you sacrifice with multiple feedings a day including those middle of the night feedings and all the difficulties that that entails. Every single thing that baby needs, they need from you. It starts with eating, ends with every diaper change and includes everything in between. There is a real physical sacrifice that comes with motherhood.
I always tell people that the early years of motherhood are very physically exhausting. I am not too far removed from these years, and while there are aspects of have little kids that I miss, I don’t miss very part. Everything your kids need they need from you. They are not self-sufficient and they are so dependent upon you. As you transition out of this physically exhausting stage, you quickly find yourself in an emotionally exhausting stage.
The difficulty of motherhood transitions from the physical to the emotional. Because you love your children so much and you desire to see their success, and as a result, you are emotionally invested in your kids, unlike any other thing or person. I am in this stage with my kids, and I know that the emotional investment and tole will only increase from here.
I’ve heard people joke before that if you’re a really selfish person, just have kids. I’m not sure that I would actually recommend that, but I do think having kids can cure a lot of selfishness. You just can’t successfully be a parent without dying to yourself.
But it’s not just the physical and mental things of motherhood that are challenging. You just love your kids so much and with great love often comes great sacrifice. Because God calls us to give our children to him. We are stewards of them. And this requires sacrifice.
Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.
Easily said. Not easily done. Have you ever tried to train a child? It is not easy. It’s almost as if they come out with this enate desire to have what they want when they want it and how they want it. Go figure.
And then proverbs 29:17 tells us
Proverbs 29:17
Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart.
This is one of the hardest parts of parenting in my opinion. Consistently disciplining and pointing children to truth through discipline. It is tiring, requires consistency, and often requires great sacrifice on the parents part. I sometimes joke with Britt that when we discipline our kids, I feel like I’m actually the one being disciplined.
If keeping a child alive, training them and disciplining them isn’t enough there are the small things throughout each day that require dying to yourself and your wants that quickly add up to immense sacrifice.
To be a mom who is following the commands of God requires truly sacrificing yourself. I cannot steward my kids well without dying to myself daily. Have you ever really thought about it that way before? That Motherhood is a gift from God and a tool in His hands where he can lead you and teach you to fully surrender to Him?
This is true in all forms of motherhood. For the mom with lots of kids. For the woman who yearns to be a mom but God has not chosen to give you children at this time. For the mom who has kids on earth, kids in heaven or both. For the mom who is raising kids that are not biologically yours. For the empty nester. For the mom of a wayward child.
Whichever of these scenarios describes you, and whatever God’s plan is for your future, it is a tool in the hands of God for him to shape you more into the image of Jesus.
God is not only using motherhood to lead you to surrender yourself to him but
- Motherhood requires us to surrender the perception that other people might have.
I can remember being a first time mom, actually before I even became a mom, I can remember saying things like:
When I have kids, they will never “ Fill in the blank”
Or when I’m a parent, I will never “ Fill in the blank”
And then… I had kids. And I realized how much is out of my control.
“Tell the bathtub potty training story”
As I was sitting on the edge of that bathtub, God used this to quickly show me how little control I actually had over my children. There are ways that I can direct them, and things that I can do for them, but ultimately there are so many things that they have to choose. The most important one being, whether or not they will follow Jesus. I cannot make my kids follow Jesus. I cannot make my kids “good” People. I think this is where a lot of Mom‘s begin to struggle with her identity.
Thoughts begin to creep in like, “ If my kids don’t walk with Jesus, what will people think of me?”
Or
“ If my child makes bad decisions, people will think that I’m a bad parent”.
Or
“ I must be doing something wrong because my kids are not turning out the way I thought they would”
Now don’t get me wrong, I do believe that parents have an immense impact on their children, and whether or not their children choose to walk with Jesus. You can’t just say “Oh – I guess I have no control over it so I don’t even need to try”. But at the end of the day, my children’s walk with Jesus is just that. Their walk. Walking with Jesus is A personal decision and the result of a personal relationship. Personal being the keyword. I cannot do it for them.
I have to surrender what people think of me. I cannot find my identity in my children or in their performance.
My identity is rooted in the fact that I am made new in Christ. Not in what I can do. It’s all in what he has done!
Finally, we have to remember that
- We have to surrender our children to the Lord.
Moms, our children do not belong to us, they belong to God. Like Abraham, God calls us to sacrifice our will completely to God and surrender our children to the Lord.
They are not mine. I have been called to raise them, to teach them, to direct them to the truth of God’s word, and then to send them out into the world to be lights. They are not mine. They are Gods. And I have to trust God with them.
Tell the story about Silas choking
When I got home I walked into my bathroom and sat down on the edge of my bathtub. Apparently this is a place where I meet Jesus. Once trying to potty train a child and this time after almost losing one.
But as I sat there I literally felt like I couldn’t breathe. It all hit me at once. I actually had a minute to think about what had happened and it really soaked in. I began to let my emotions rule, thinking about all the “what if’s” and even thinking about the future and letting fear creep in. You know, thoughts like “what if this happened and I wasn’t home? – Okay that means I can never leave them alone again” OR “What if I wouldn’t have been able to get it out? I felt so ill prepared. What would I have done?”
All of these thoughts have led me to remember that Silas, or any of my children, are not mine. I had to take those thoughts captive. Their days are ordained by God. Their story is in his hands. The outcome is his and not mine to control. The ending is not about my comfort but his plan and ultimately his glory. My kids are not mine – they are his. And I either really believe that or I do not.
Here’s the truth, ladies…
- The Bible teaches the Lord opens the womb. We cannot control whether or not we have children in the first place. Whether God gives us children or not, we are called to trust Him.
- I have lost a child to a miscarriage. I know many of you know that pain firsthand. We cannot control the lifespan of our children. God is sovereign over life and death.
- And if children are born to me, they are not mine, they are His. I must surrender my children completely to God.
When I surrender – this is when I truly experience the love, joy, and peace that God offers. When I truly believe that I can trust Him – it is there that I find purpose and rest. Whatever my lot, thou has taught me to say “It is well with my soul.”
Ladies, you can entrust your motherhood to God. He is trustworthy. When you surrender completely to the will of God you will find the very best that God has for you there. Right in the middle of his will and his plan. Do you believe that? Will you surrender to Him?
Surrender is not a one time decision it is the culmination of many small decisions where I have to give it over to God each step of the way. Just like Abraham did.
There is nothing like coming close to losing a child that will remind you that they are not yours. I cannot control the outcome.
I can control my response and whether or not I trust God.
Just as Abraham said – “Here I am” I have the opportunity to respond to God and say “here I am” no matter what the road looks like.
CONCLUSION
God has used the story of Abrham to remind me of the importance of surrender in motherhood.
Abraham followed and obeyed God. Willing to sacrifice his own son if it meant obeying and surrendering to God.
Remember all of the steps he took in the story that required surrender?
The story begins with him verbally saying to the Lord, “Here I am.”
Then he tells him to go to a place God will show him. What does it look like to go to the place God will tell you?
Then Abraham has to chop the very wood he will lay his son on. What does it look like for you to cut the wood in your life?
As they are going Abraham has the faith to say “We will be back”. Has God given you the faith in the midst of difficulty to say “we will come back”?
Then Abraham had to walk side by side with Isaac as they climbed the mountain where he would sacrifice him. What mountain is God asking you to climb with your child?
Next, Abraham has to bind Isaac and lay him on the very wood that he had earlier chopped. What does it mean for you to lay your child on the altar?
Finally, right before Abraham is about to sacrifice Isaac, God stops him saying “Abraham!” and Abraham verbally responds in surrender again, saying the words “Here. I. Am.” He didn’t know what God would say – but he had already surrendered to it.
Are you willing to say these words, no matter what the answer is?
Here. I. Am.
God didn’t just keep his promise to Abraham, he went above and beyond in blessing him! God provided more than Abraham could ask or think. Abraham said here I am and God showed up big time.
When we are willing to surrender to the Lord in motherhood I believe the blessing is above and beyond what we could imagine. It probably isn’t what you imagine, but I can guarantee you that it is there.
Blessing is not the same as a fairytale. The road is not always easy that God has us walk. The end result is not always what we think it will be. But the blessing is there because to be a part of God’s story, his plan and will, it is full of blessing.
The sacrifice was never Isaac – it was always Abraham.
Moms – God wants to use motherhood to bring you to a palace of surrender.
It can start this morning if you are willing to just hold your hands out and say
“Here. I. Am.”
Invitation:
I want you moms to bow in prayer with me. If you are comfortable with it, I would also like to ask you to extend your hands in front of you. Just reach out your hands in a physical gesture of surrender.
Pray with me….
I would like to invite all the mothers in this room to stand with me and to sing the words of this song as an act of surrender to the Lord. Surrender is one of the most authentic and beautiful forms of worship and I believe that through worship we can truly experience hearts surrendered to the Lord.